This post looks at the beliefs we hold through the lens of being like ‘organisms’ that are fuelled from the ‘evidence’ that we feed them. It provides you with a short process to surface the limiting beliefs that are getting in the way of a reality you want to create. It then invites you to identify a possibility-fueled belief to displace the one that is keeping you stuck and to get the structure and support in place to ‘feed’ this healthy belief to so that you can intentionally create the reality you desire.
We all have a set/series of base beliefs that control how we experience ourselves, others and the world around us. These beliefs can be either limiting or enabling and from that place they either take us away from the life we want to live or toward it. They tend to be ‘I am’ declared statements, for example:
- I am a good friend/ I am a bad friend
- I am lovable/ I am not lovable
- I am capable/ I am not very capable
- I am resilient/ I am not a resilient person
- I am worthy/ I am not worthy of (being happy, belonging to this group etc ).
As an example of a limiting belief, if we have a base belief that everything in life is scary, then when events and situations happen we are more likely to react to them from a place of fear. Because this belief that life is scary governs how we see the world, we aren’t able to respond to the same events and situations from a place of possibility.
Living organisms: a metaphor for beliefs
I was recently introduced to the idea of thinking about beliefs as being living organisms. This metaphor really resonated with me, so I wanted to share it with you. Just as organisms seek out and feed off the things that nourish them, our beliefs look for evidence to validate their own viewpoint. When a belief locates evidence to support itself, the belief (as the organism) becomes bigger and stronger. Let’s look at a short example of this.
In 1987, at the age of 17, I had an English teacher say to me, ‘You really don’t write very well, do you?’ Those eight words, almost a throwaway line on the day, stayed with me. They cemented a core belief in me that what she had said was true, that I am not good at writing. She was, after all, a highly qualified and experienced teacher of English (evidence to feed that belief).
Having accepted this belief was true and that there was nothing I could do about it, the belief continued to seek out and gather ‘evidence’ to support itself. It did this for the next 30 years. 30 years: that’s a very long time. I would write a personal message on a birthday card and immediately judge it as not very good. I would take hours and hours, beyond what was reasonable, to write an otherwise straightforward board report or business presentation. I would become annoyed with myself for my seemingly inept attempt to articulate how I was feeling in my own personal journal – something no-one else was ever going to read! All this ‘evidence’ continued to fuel this belief that I was not a good writer.
It took many years for me to really understand how accepting this fear-based belief as true was limiting me in the direction I wanted to head with my life and my business.
In 2017, at the age of 47, I made a clear decision. This belief had had power over me for too long. Sitting on the cusp of a massive growth edge, I nervously yet knowingly chose to put this belief into a metaphorical ‘backpack’. It was time to allow the internal voice of my own wisdom to be truly acknowledged and lead the way. That little voice inside me was telling me that I needed to write and share what I had learned with others. With the support and encouragement of David (a professional editor) by my side, I started my blog in 2018.
It wasn’t all smooth sailing by any measure. I recall a phone call from David after I had drafted my very first blog. Let me just say for various and very legitimate reasons it was scrapped altogether. A total disaster. But I had made a start. What could have been some new evidence to support the belief that I did not write very well, I chose to ignore rather than attach any weight to it. The exciting thing was that very soon I discovered how much joy I felt when I was writing. Before long, the writing was flowing freely and I had released a flow of material and insights that wanted to be shared.
Here we are in the third year of my blog and there’s plenty more to say yet! And there is a book on the way as well.
Turning fear-based beliefs into possibility-fuelled beliefs
Perhaps you have a belief that is getting in the way of a reality you want to create or a project you want to realise or a relationship you want to nurture? Can you pin it down? Can you identify how it’s reinforcing itself with self-fulfilling ‘evidence’?
The first step in a situation like this is to get clear about the reality that you want to create. You then need to understand what you have control over.
I really wanted to share what I had learned with others through writing a blog.
I had control over choosing a different belief. I had control over starting to write anyway. I had control over identifying and engaging the support that I needed.
The next step is to surface the beliefs that are keeping you from moving toward that reality.
I am not good at written expression.
Then choose a more helpful belief:
Possibility-fuelled belief: I am worthy of sharing my experience with others through writing a blog /I am able to be useful to others through my written expression/ I am capable of writing a blog that is worth reading.
Now, there are three things to bring this all to life:
- make a conscious choice to feed the new belief and starve the old belief
- get the support in place that you need to help you create your reality, and
- start to look for evidence to nourish the possibility-fuelled belief to become bigger and stronger
In my case, the old belief – I cannot write – no longer lives within me. As I somewhat nervously published my blog, putting it out into the world, magic started to happen. I received emails and phone calls from people thanking me for something I had written that had resonated for them. This became powerful ‘evidence’ that supported my new belief – I am capable of writing a blog that is worth reading.
Do you have a new reality that you want to create?
What do you have control over in this situation?
What fear-based belief/s are limiting you?
What is the new possibility-fuelled belief that you choose?
What ‘evidence’ do you already have that supports this new belief?
What support do you need to keep growing the ‘evidence’ that makes sure this belief thrives and fuels your desired reality?
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